


Sniper's Best Day

by GunMetal_Metallic_Grey7



Category: Team Fortress 2
Genre: Bows & Arrows, Comedy, Kukri, Mercenaries, Pissed Off Sniper, Revenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-14
Updated: 2015-06-14
Packaged: 2018-04-04 08:06:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4130562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GunMetal_Metallic_Grey7/pseuds/GunMetal_Metallic_Grey7
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sniper gets an arrow head lodged in his arse thanks to his double ganger.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sniper's Best Day

Not really. It was actually Sniper's worst day ever. Having an arrow head lodged in his ass was not how he planned on ending a mission. He knew one thing; He was going to blow BLU Sniper's head right of his shoulders. His bloody double ganger got a good kick out of shooting him right in the ass and watching him fall to his death right out of his blind. Christ, BLU Sniper and Spy could barely breath from laughing. Sniper imagined the rest of the BLUs had a good laugh. Sniper - on the other hand - was not laughing. Quite the opposite actually.

Respawn may have brought him back to life, but the bloody thing didn't remove the arrow head that was now lodge into his left arse cheek. The second he was brought back to the respawn room, he let out a wail that he and the other REDs thought his parents could have heard all the way in Australia. 

At that time, Spy and Scout were the only two in the respawn room. The two giving Sniper a concerned look. Once Sniper mustered the will to actually speak, he explained his "predicament" though there were more curses then he planned on mixed into the sentence. That just made it all the more hilarious to Scout. The Sniper growled and clenched his teeth. Scout was now on the top of his hit list next to Blu Sniper. Scout's name on the first bullet that would leave the barrel of his gun on the next mission. 

"Don't just stand there, you bloody wankas, get the damn Medic!" The Sniper was getting pissed and grabbing at his Kukri in its sheath.

"S'il vous plâit, mon ami, relax. I'll take you to Medic," Spy said calmly, doing his best to aid Sniper to the med bay. Scout, well, it was pointless thinking he'd actually help with this kind of problem. 

Sniper's curses echoed off the walls and reverberated through the hall as he all but waddled his way to the Medic with Spy's aid. The pain only increasing with every step he took. 

"I'll have that damn Sniper's head for this," Sniper hissed and bared his abnormally large canines. "Fuckin' piker, he and that damn spook."

The cursing and promise for revenge on the BLUs only continued and never ceased. Not even when Sniper and Spy got to the med bay. There, Medic stood outside the doors with his arms crossed. He was wondering what all the yelling was about. For a moment he scootnized the Sniper, not noticing any external injuries. The cursing told him otherwise. 

"Vat iz the problem, herr Sniper? I see no external injuries." 

"I got a fuckin' arrow 'ead stuck in my arse, now get the bloody thing out!" Sniper snarled and pushed Spy away from him. 

It took all Medic had not to laugh as he lead the distraught Sniper inside. "Have a seat," Medic glanced at Sniper as he stood by the gurney seathing with anger. "Never mind. I'll need you to strip from your jeans."

"You better make this fast," Sniper grumbled as he unbuckled his belt and dropped his pants.

While Medic went to work on Snipers issue, the rest of the seven mercenaries crowded outside the room. Spy and Engineer seemed to be the only two concerned for Sniper. The rest, they stood there biting at their lips so Sniper wouldn't notice their laughter. Pyro really didn't do anything. No one really knew if Pyro even understood what was going on. 

With a loud shriek from inside the room then silence following, the mercenaries figured it be best to leave and let Sniper have his space. They watched silently - not really - as Sniper made his way to his camper van and slammed the door shut behind him. Once everything set in, they knew the next day they'd have to watch their heads and not turn their back on the Sniper. 

 

The sniper was never one to disappoint, and he surely didn't the next day during the mission. The RED and BLUs had a common enemy as Sniper took out his anger on pretty much everyone. The BLU Sniper having received bullets and arrows right to the head all day, along with the bloody spook. Though it was BLI sniper that did most of the damage yesterday, Scout got on his last nerve all day everyday. 

When Sniper got the perfect opportunity, he waited till Scout had his back turned and gave the wanka an arrow right to the arse. His wails were music to Sniper's ears as he sat back in his blind, laughing as he watched the struggling scout through his scope and sipped his coffee from his favorite mug. Today turned out better than he had expected. 

"Thanks for standin' still, you bloody piker." 


End file.
